The beautiful young woman on the phone was describing her experience in the forest, hearing the voice of the Earth speak to her of thousands of years of pain. As a child, her parents and all the elders told her to pray. They told her that if she would pray, she would feel God in her heart, but although she prayed and prayed, she felt nothing. And then this, this mystery, this miracle, this sitting on the Earth and hearing, simply hearing the voice of the Mother herself, telling the story of her pain.
And her heart broke wide open and she began to feel everything and hear everything– all of the feelings, all of the voices of the One Being. At first the voices of pain were easier to hear and she felt her life slipping away into the Abyss, her soul tumbling into fear and desolation. But as she fell, another voice reached out to her from beyond the Void, penetrating her heart, filling her soul with light and hope.
“Go back to the earth and make love, little one.” it said. “Make love on the prairie, on the beach, on the forest floor. So many people are raped on the Earth nowadays, but so few people lie down in love on her body.
“Make love on her. Make wild love on her. Make crazy love on her. Let her feel your ecstasy. Let her feel your joy. Let her know how grateful you are for your life. Let her know how grateful you are for your life. Thank her for the gift of your life with your whole body and everything you feel– what prayer could be more beautiful than this? What prayer could be more beautiful than this?
“Tell her, tell her you will do whatever is within your power to do to help to heal this world and ask her to heal you, ask her, humbly and openly, to heal you, to heal you completely, so that you may serve the healing of this world.
“Then put all your attention to your healing. And when it is done, when it is done, when the healing is completed, live your vow– give all you are able to give to the healing of this world. You will see miracles.
“You will see miracles. And you will be Magic.”
That was my voice. I am her Teacher, her Guide. And these things I learned from my Teacher, my Guide, but when the world was cracking open for me and rushing into my heart with all it’s pain and joy and horror and beauty, and the tears did not stop for more than four years, I did not have a Guide.
I am lucky to be here in this world. So fortunate not to have been consumed by desolation and darkness. When I first met Shahabuddin, he pointed me out from a group of about 75 people and said, “You almost didn’t make it.” And I knew it was true.
So I am here, now for the young people of our community, holding the light as they traverse the darkness, throw themselves headlong into the abyss, penetrate the Void, all in the name of finding that Truth which Awakens within us as Embodied Divine Love. Hopefully, their journeys will be easier than mine because I am here. Hopefully, I will save them some time. My mother always said, “A good teacher will save you time.” One never knows, though. One just does the best that one can do every moment and the rest is up to the brilliant Universe.
We rarely talk about ourselves as individual “I’s” in the Dervish tradition, but my life is all I have to offer to the world. It is the most precious gift God has given me, and it is the most precious gift I can give. So I talk about my life. I write about my life. I love my life. I live my life. And I strive to inspire others to live their lives in this way- with complete fullness, with uncompromised vitality.
Amidst all this pain and suffering, there is so much beauty here, and as we learn to love through and beyond it all, as we learn to transform the darkness within and around us, not by denial but by embracing, we become, one by one, part of the healing.
The Message which came through for this beautiful, sensitive young woman opening into her enlightenment, is a Message for All of us– if we can call up the courage to heal ourselves, we can heal the world. We can heal this world. Together. All we have to do is heal ourselves and it will begin.
In Loving Kindness,